Lack there of,

It's been a minute since I posted in this dear blog of mine.

As most of you may be well aware, 

I stay busy..

All the time..

But a random thought I had tonight

After a recent battle with, for lack of a better word, lack of sexy times...

It's safe to say I felt exactly like this girl.

Ahh the things we go through some times..

No more secrets

I deleted my private blog today, the place I would go where no one knew my name.

 The place where those friendly folks had not a bad word to say to me.

Not a frown on their faces.

A place where they to had some bad things to say that maybe they didn't want people to know.

I decided I didn't need this place anymore.

I realized it's not my style to hide behind a name.

I behind a faceless image. 

It's not my style.

I'm better than that

I don't need the secret life anymore.

I simply need ME.

I think I'd found happy recently

I think it's something I don't think I need

For many a reason

I don't think that was the happy for me. 

I think I just need me

I think I've lost me

I think I'm going to work on bringing her back, because I miss her. 

Tired ..... of being....

-UW

Go ahead, love everybody!

I'm pretty sure we all get to the point on occasion (every day for me). Where you'd love nothing more than to punch most people in the face.

Maybe I'm a different kind of woman, but most people piss me off. Daily!  Pretty much all people on the list there.

But how can you not appreciate something funny on a Friday!  I know I do. I refuse to let the world bother me too much today.  It's Friday you know and I plan to spend the night with a group of my favorite ladies.  Finally!

Bad Mommy?

I catch myself at times being a royal bitch. Well I'm typically always a bitch. One way or another, it's just going to happen. I'm at a point in my life where everything pisses me off and with few exceptions everyone pisses me off as well.

I'm beginning to worry though that some of my ways will rub off on my darling little girl.  Ya see I have a lot of...issues. Not in the sense that I'm neurotic or unbalanced or anything..

My main thing right now is my weight. Sure I am far from fat  as I tend to call myself.  But I've blown past my preferred weight.  With that I am not comfortable.  Few of you followers have read my struggles with my weight issues.  What bothers me most is, I'd hate for my daughter to ever say those things. I hate the idea that she could possible develop some eating disorder because of her Mommy's crazyness. 

There I said it... I think I could be slightly crazy.  Just a little!

Then there is of course my cleaning spells. I do it...constantly. If I'm home, I'm cleaning. I don't spend much time sitting on the couch. I don't spend much time being affectionate. That's another  issue. Is it bad that my child has or will develop issues with PDA or any form of A for that matter? Am I some how in the wrong for not being an affectionate person?  I do hug my child though.  It's how I've always been or how I tend to end up anyway.

It bugs me my child might grow up to be like me.... But why should it?

I have so many things that scare me, things I hear my child say she doesn't like either. She says she won't go back in the water, because of a "foot in mouth" moment I had the other night.  Yea so apparently it never registered with my darling that sharks are in the ocean. Even in Florida.  Yea, so now she's got a phobia with that.  Just like me. Spiders, snakes, certain foods.  Gawd! 

It's a vicious cycle... Isn't it?

Like we always said, We didn't want to grow up to be like our parents... It's inevitable isn't it.  They're going to grow up and be like us...Aren't they? 

I could sit and stress that issue.. But instead I think I will keep being myself and if I see my child reflecting any of my negativity. We set it straight then.  Till then I try and keep things to myself, things of the eating and weight issues. 

Till then I will keep being the same old rawking Mommy that I've always been. Because no matter what my issues might be, I'm a good Mom and that's all there is to it!!! 

I'm ready

I watched her pass by the mirror

One last glance to check her shoes

I'd seen them pass by already

They were glorious!  A deep red, like fresh blood

Very attractive addition to the silky smooth black and blue dress

Her short dark hair spiked and ready to go.

The eyeliner drawn perfectly around those blue eyes

I look awesome she thought to herself

Turning with a smile

It was time to head out for the night.

House work....Again?

How am I suppose to feel

When you look at me that way?

When you glare your glare?

Throw your fist in the air?

Kick the dust away?

I wasn't ready for this life again.

I wasn't prepared to wear that apron.

Those wooden shoes.

I didn't sign up for this!

Seems like a waste of time, to me.

I can't seem to find the point in a certain new 'friendship' when I'm the one putting forth all the new effort.  Whilst I attempt many times at conversation, which you grant me. 

But then of course turn the tables to a new day and hear nothing. 

Is it I've the one with all the words to speak?

I've the one with the life to share?

I'm the one who isn't afraid to be rejected?

Because I do and I'm not!

I'm living out out.

Hear me loud and clear.

I don't need you, ya know?

You may very well just be there.

The empty pool of nothing to offer this world.

Mean words I dare spit out here?

Yea, that's how I roll.

Now I wait.  If ya think you have time. One day...

Maybe I will still be there!
Yea, probably not!



A big F you

photo source

They want to pass a law to make it unlawful for women to have abortions.  This goes beyond any insurance bullshit. This is a direct attack on the rights of Americans.  Not just American's but women everywhere. 

Don't compare me to a  fucking cow or a sheep and that I can't abort a dead fetus from my body.  Fuck you America and your attacks on my rights as a woman on my rights as an AMERICAN CITIZEN!

In the words of others, until you have a vagina don't tell me what I can do with mine!



source

I was once ashamed,

photo credit

The news spread the word that they want it to where insurance companies are not covering the cost of women who have abortions or women who take birth control? Not the women, just the abortions and the birth control.

I wasn't aware, are  they trying to repopulate the country or something?  I had no idea. Count me out though. If they don't want to cover my birth control pills, they make other contraceptives.

Im not proud to admit it, but I've had an abortion. It wasn't the greatest experience. I am PRO CHOICE but I don't think it's right for women and people to take advantage and use this method as birth control.  Thats not good on our bodies.  For the bible thumpers, their god would not approve. It's murder they will tell you.  YOu know the stories. The awful tales...

Ever think about adoption?

Be pro choice, be pro life.  Just BE.  SMART

It's a housewife you want?

I'm sitting in this rut.

I just can't stand it.

It's making me nuts.

I look around and it's everywhere.

It's everything.

It's something.

It's nothing!

Tie the rag in my hair.

Wrap the apron around my waist.

I'm taking off these work clothes.

I'm retiring these work shoes.
I'm planting this ass in this home and never going into the  office.
I've stopped being everything.
I stopped when you stopped.
Now I sit in misery, looking around.
The same dusty floors,
the same clothes piled high.
Never a change,
never an exciting world to see.
Always the same house wife TV,
always the same smiling faces.
A face masked by that smile
while underneath they cry and suffer.
Good day world.
Fuck Off!

Dearest Florence,

Now I blog one of my favorite women. She's beautiful and her music is lifechanging and breathtaking.  Man of you know or have heard Florence and The Machine, for those who haven't. Take time out of your busy schedule and listen to her music.  Any of it, I bet you won't be dissappointed.

Enjoy!


photo taken here

Ms. Jaime,

Jaime Pressley's character in My Name is Earl.  Of course she has been featured in many a film and shows, but I remember her vividly from My Name is Earl and I believe I fell in love with her truly when she beat the hell out of Juliet Lewis's character in the show. It was probably one of the best chick fights I've seen in a while, because there wasn't any scratching and screeching, no hair pulling and biting.  They went all out, toe to toe fist throwing fighting like to grown ass men. I loved it. I've loved Juliet Lewis for many a year as well, she was awesome in Natural Born Killers which just so happens to be one of my favorite movies, if not all time favorite, again, she threw down in that movie, kicked anyone and every ones ass she could. It was awesome.

No, I'm not a violent person, I've never once been in a fight and have absolutely no intentions of doing so, but think, how awesome would it be just to kick some mother fucking ass sometimes?!! 

Enjoy, she is my woman of today.  Who's yours?

Li Lykke Timotej Zachrisson

Lykke Li was born in 1986, daughter to a musician (father) and photographer (mother). 

A Sweedish beauty. I've only recently (the last year or so) fallen in love with the sounds of Lykke's music. Her voice is nothing less than beautiful and her songs sound as though they are full of so much passion and life. I can almost bet any of us can relate to at least one of her songs at some point in life.

 On occasion I can listen to her albums over again for weeks at a time.

It's definitely on my top 5 of music and beautiful women.

Readers, if you haven't gave her a listen yet, do not hesitate any longer. 

It's definitely worth the jam!

(photo taken here)
(more info here)

Barrymore, Drew

"I think happiness is what makes you pretty. Period. Happy people are beautiful. They become like a mirror and they reflect that happiness."
— Drew Barrymore



Marilyn

Although her beauty was not apparent to me until the last few years, I remember buying this picture in a beautiful picture for my mother one Christmas and she was having such a bad day (medically) she cried when she saw it's beauty.  It may have been then that I really found the beauty in her face and her style and just HER! Marilyn Monroe!  So beautiful!

Phillis Wheatley

Phillis  Wheatley

Photo taken here

On Imagination-Phillis Wheatley

THY various works, imperial queen, we see, How bright their forms! how deck'd with pomp by thee!  They wond'rous acts in beauteous order stand, And all attest how potent is thine hand.  From Helicon's refulgent heights attend, Ye sacred choir, and my attempts befriend:  To tell her gories with a faithful tongue, Ye blooming graces, triumph in my song.  Now here, now there, the roving Fancy flies, Till some lov'd object strikes her wand'ring eyes, Whose silken fetters all the senses bind, And soft captivity involves the mind.  Imaginiation! who can sing thy force?  Or who describe the swiftness of thy course? Soaring through air to find the bright abode,  Th' empyreal palace of the thund'ring God, We on thy pinions can surpass the wind, And leave the rolling universe behind: From star to star the mental optics rove, Measure the skies, and range the realms above. There in one view we grasp the mighty whole, Or with new worlds amaze th' unbounded soul. Through Winter frowns to Fancy's raptur'd eyes The fields may flourish, and gat scenes arise; The frozen deeps may break their iron bands, And bid their waters murmur o'er the sands. Fair Flora may resume her fragrant reign, And with her flow'ry riches deck the plain; Sylvanus may diffuse his honours round, And all the forest may with leaves be crown'd: Show'rs may descend, and dews their gems disclose, And nectar sparkle on the blooming rose.  Such is thy pow'r, nor are thine orders vain, O thou the leader of the mental train: In full perfection all thy works are wrought, And thine the sceptre o'er the realms of thought. Before thy throne the subject-passions bow, Of subject-passions sov'reign ruler thou; At thy command joy rushes on the heart; And through the glowing veins the spirits dart. Fancy might now her silken pinions try To rise from earth, and sweep th' expanse on high: From Tithon's bed now might Aurora rise, Her cheeks all glowing with celestial dies, While a pure stream of light o'erflows the skies. The monarch of the day I might behold,  And all the mountains tipt with radiant gold, But I reluctant leave the pleasing views, Which Fancy dresses to delight the Muse; Winter austere forbids me to aspire, And northern tempests damp the rising fire; They chill the tides of Fancy's flowing sea, Cease then, my song, cease the unequal lay.

Noise Rock!

"I just happened to start playing music for the conceptual ideas" -Kim Gordon

(photo taken here)

Kim Gordon

Another American beauty. Born in New York.  Musician, Vocalist, Record Producer, Video Producer and Actress. 

After searching through ideas, this one came again from a dear friend.  Sonic Youth the band with Kim Gordon was a huge inspiration for Nirvana, namely Kurt Cobain.  Her style led him in the direction he chose to go with his music.  Not to stray but Nirvana paved the way for a lot of great Grunge and Alternative music. 

Without the greats like Kim Gordon and Sonic Youth we my have never experienced the greats like Kurt Cobain and Nirvana! 

I salute thee Mrs. Gordon!



All Swift like!

A little insight on tonight's post, before I begin babbling.  I was at a loss of awesome women tonight and went to one of my bestest guy friends for his suggestions.  He surprised me  with his response. I would have never had guessed.  So yes, Ive a bit of idea block tonight, but feel the need to blog abouts someone awesome. So, without further ado, this credit is not mine to take, but I'm always glad to share. 

(photo taken here)

Taylor Swift.  Let me being by saying, my knowledge of Taylor Swift goes as far as knowing,  A) she is a country singer and B) My cousin LOVES her, she was totally excited about her concert in July, unfortunately she rescheduled due to sickness. Sad days for my  cousin. 

So here's what little bit of information I received from my guy friend.  Taylor Swift, singer, writer, musician.  Typical of few these days. What happened to the days where you went to see a BAND and that band had at least a singer, guitar player, bass player and drummer? Those days seem rare. A lot of today's music makes me sick at my stomach and miss the days when music was just that. None of this crap that rots my brain and makes my head ache.  Ahhh to dream. 
(babbling)
So we have Miss Taylor Swift, she can be all of what 20 something?  Sheesh!  Here I sit about to hit my 30's with "laugh lines" around my eyes, wishing I could be early 20 something again.  So she writes her own music, yes it's country music, I wouldn't listen to it unless there was a bet involved and a sum of money worth listening.  Sorry Miss Swift, I don't dig the country music.  But I can give you props for writing your own music. Not only that but you do it all, composing, singing, writing (as I said) and producing. It takes guts and dedication these days to make it big time.  And PROPS for you honey.  I'd say that is pretty rawking for a good ole country girl!

So a little more insight here, Taylor Swift, born Taylor Alison Swift,  12/13/89.  As I thought, still a baby.  Another American Beauty, born in Pennsylvania.  Her career is still young, as she herself and I'd say she is doing pretty well. All these young ones these days just makes me feel old.  So for your viewing pleasure and listening as well ( I'm not watching or listening) Enjoy!

OK... so I didn't have luck with the video upload thing and it was being so stupid slow  that this one is the only one to show up.  Go figure, but she's playing a banjo.  Banjos are awesome.  Just sayin'.



Beautiful

(photo taken here)

Heather Joan Graham....  I shall begin this by saying, she is my definition of beautiful. She always has been. I've been picked on for announcing my girl crush on this lady, but she is worthy to me.  They pick and poke with their disagreements but it never turns me away. I've loved Heather Graham since the first time I saw her on television and sadly, I can't remember which film that was!

(photo taken here)

Heather Graham born American and in Wisconsin, the cheese state, or so they tell me anyways. Her mother an actress and writer, her father a retired FBI agent. By my definition that makes her no less than AWESOME.  She starred in many films, some of my favorites would be Austin Powers, The Hangover, Boogie Nights, From Hell, Committed. That's just naming a few. 

Her beauty and talent makes it hard for me to not Love her to death.

My Love-Sia

It's a cover of Sia, but it's beautifully done and the woman singing has done an awesome job. Very beautiful indeed! Ive yet to find an actual video for this song. Never the less, I love it!